chances are slim we are right.
We got in the car, just the two of us. I knew being alone together wasn’t good, it wasn’t good for either one of us. But, I didn’t care. It was cold outside, and my body shivered when I sat down. You immediately leaned up in his chair, leaning over the console towards my seat. I turned my body around to face him and pulled my legs up next to me. My stomach was jumping around inside of me, and my brain was running a marathon but only going in circles. I don’t remember what we said anymore, I know we said a lot. I remember it being important. I remember you feeling exasperated; I imagine our words all had something to do with “what do we do?”… All I remember thinking is, shit. I’m so screwed.
Slowly, we gravitated towards each other. At first, our fingertips only touched. Then your hand was on my arm. Then I was touching your arm. Then you touched my waist. You brushed the lingering hair out of my eyes, like you always used to do. I looked up, into your eyes. Your face was so close, I could feel your breath on me. The continents that were once between us, barely islands now…
“I’ve missed those eyes.” you whispered, with a faint smile, as your finger brushed my cheek. I leaned into your hand and sighed, “they’ve missed you too…”
You leaned in closer. You softly kissed my cheek.
Realizing what you did, you quickly said, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sending mixed signals. I’m sorry.”
I replied, “It’s okay… my cheek didn’t mind,” which only brought you closer.
Remembering how I used to melt for a forehead kiss from you, you tauntingly said, “well, I know your forehead doesn’t mind” and kissed me a few times. I was looking down, I couldn’t look at you. Shit, shit, shit. Please don’t…
You wrapped your hand around my cheek gently, and ran your fingers through my hair. Hesitatingly I moved towards you, falling slowly.
“I miss you too much for this…” I confessed, my voice fading with every word.
“I know, baby, I know. I miss you too… I shouldn’t be doing this.”
We didn’t move…
What we needed and what we wanted were two different things entirely.
You kissed me, softly and slowly.
I didn’t want to let you go. Neither of us moved.
“We knew this would happen…” I sighed.
“We did. But, I think we needed this,” I looked up at you (my eyes only slightly watery), “we never had a last kiss.”
I closed my eyes and pulled away.
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